“If I am not good to myself, how can I expect anyone else to be good to me?”
Maya Angelou
We all do it, talk to ourselves.
Out loud or in our heads, we’re constantly in a conversation with our inner critic and/or bestfriend. Sometimes we’re marvelous and channelling light from all different angles, while other times we’re hopeless or not enough. Our inner dialogue determines how we conquer our day and deal with conflict. If you’re in a “why me” victimised mindframe, chances are a lot higher that you will always see the world as being against you. A mindset that allows us to see opportunities instead of obstacles will always persevere and enrich us in the long run.
Positive self-talk is the conversation that goes on in your head. It is who you believe you are.  Who we believe we are on the inside, the world around us will accept. People who believe they will achieve success and envision their rise, often do. Those with a poorer outlook remain submerged in their own self doubt and negative bubble. This inner chatter and self awareness  is what separates those who are winning to those left behind.
You are Amazing.Fantastic.Talented.Worthy.
Don’t feel it? Don’t look it? It doesn’t matter. Positive affirmations about yourself go a long way on the road to a stronger well being. Everybody has crap days, that’s why we are blessed with a tomorrow. You should wake up each morning knowing that you are capable of achieving anything you desire, even if you wake up on the ‘wrong side of the bed.’ While it is quite easy to slip into old bad habits and negative thought patterns, take a step back and remind yourself these sly forms of procrastination do not allow you to move forward, toward your better self.Nobody and nothing can break your stride unless you allow them to. Ever wondered how certain people don’t let petty things get to them? These are the same people who choose their battles wisely within themselves and those around them because they don’t allow their stronger sense of self to be compromised by values not aligned with their vision of who they are and what they believe about themselves.
“I can’t” vs. “I can”
Henry Ford was right when he said, “Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t, you’re right.” I’m certain you’d rather kick your goals, than kick yourself for 

photo 3 (46)not even attempting after life has passed you by.

If you’re discontentedly sitting in a state of inertia, ask yourself what is really holding you back. What are you afraid of? People who practice positive self talk refuse to see the obstacles before any journey. They acknowledge they are there, but are devising a way to make it happen while those convincing themselves they can’t do something, end up doing nothing and never move forward. We all want to be happy, fruitful and prosperous but with this comes a lot of hard work and effort. When you find yourself in a position where you can either sink or swim, find the way to swim because even by trying, you’re already ahead.

Find the Positive in the Negative

Is the glass half full or half empty? Our interpretation of what we see and what happens to us leaves an impressionable mark on our self awareness. There is a lesson to learn from every setback, preparing you for the next round. Positive self talkers are wired to see the best in people and situations. They too, are faced with challenges but a positive outlook loosens the chains of negativity and keeps them moving forward. In an idealistic world, negativity would be abolished but without the tough times and dark holes, how are we to determine the value of the good times when they arrive?

What is your unhappiness trying to tell you?

You are who you hang out with

Jim Rohn said, “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” Take a look around you, who do you drink with? Who inspires you? Do they believe in you?  What exactly do you talk about? Do they bring out the best in you? Or are you left pondering in self doubt and pity?

photo (10)This life is not a competition about who has a better job, degree or income. Good people are able to connect and devote altruistic ventures to absolutely anyone they meet. They also know when it’s time to close the door on those that are a compromise. They inspire your better self to shine in the light by taking a risk and following your dreams. People that hold you back are a distraction to your soul and personal development.

Negative people are just as contagious as negative thoughts, they will make you sick over time. You probably won’t even notice but this is a distraction your better self will not appreciate. If you’re around people who judge, gossip and plague your thoughts in the wrong places, you’re wasting time and time is our most precious gift of all. Be strong enough to know when to walk away from those who no longer serve your spirit’s boundaries.

Pay closer attention to the way you speak to yourself, be aware of where you allow your mind to wander. Make sure the place is positive and doesn’t dwell backwards. Be your own visionary and invent a world that sparkles, in your head and in reality.

Side Note:

Yes, I tell myself I am fantastic everyday, a few times a day actually. I also tell myself that I’m a loser for tripping over a twig on the street. When I decided to get sober last year, the “I can’t” outweighed the “I can,” so I convinced myself that if I didn’t change my ways that I would die. This method is now embedded into my thought reasoning in every other aspect of my life.  I like to honour the good in people but even I can’t help bumping into douchebags, these distractions get no more than five minutes of my time and allow me to focus on people who deserve my time. Next. When my world started collapsing last year, I did something my twenty-one year old self  would never have done- I took a step back and then another. For three months, I watched everyone around me and knew who I’d politely let go of before I walked into my new life in Europe. Despite the demise, I still only choose to remember the good times.